Here I sit, considering my past week.
What inspiration can I share with you, dear people?
Hum.
My thoughts first go to the Arena of the Bitch.
May I bitch?
Of course.
Right?
Bitch-permission granted.
Well, to name a few:
- Freezing cold March “in like a lion” winds almost tore off my flesh, while walking a happy little oblivious puppy.
- Pee and poop were not in the forefront of said puppy’s experience. Smell, to my dismay, was.
- Every twig, rock, pebble, blade of once-grass was investigated.
- I might have scolded my little-bundle-of-life puppy.
- She outlived that.
- I outlived that, too. I warmed up. There was eventual pee/poop.
- Not on my time frame. Not on my request.
~~~
- I single-handedly took on the Ma. COVID-Everybody-Gets-a-Vaccine-but-You-Website, for unrelenting hours.
- I believe I might have lost.
- Temporarily.
- I outlived that. I chilled. Eventually, calm was restored.
- An appointment was uncovered. Eventually.
- Not on my time frame. Not on my request.
~~~
Okay.
There are two examples.
Plenty, I hope, to illustrate my point.
Here is what I know and believe.
Reality is relentless.
It wins.
This is eventually good news,
No matter what happens.
I get to participate in life as it is.
Most importantly, I get to relax into it.
The more I relax, the sooner the dog poops!
(Did I just really say that publicly? I actually do think there is cosmic truth in that.)
The sooner the appointment emerges.
There just is no pushing-the-river.
There’s playing in the river.
There’s jumping into the river.
There’s enjoying the river.
Changing it?
Good luck, folks.
Softening around what is,
Relaxing into what is happening….
That works
And then, taking action, yes!
Of course,
But to allow the
Moment to be what it is.
My tendency?
I rush in to change it.
I rush in to fix it.
I rush in to make the moment
As I think it should be.
Human behavior?
Yes.
Expected behavior?
Of course.
Effective behavior?
Not always.
Think—yoga mat.
Think—yoga practice.
To relax, to soften,
To melt into what is happening.
To relax around the sensations.
That works off the mat, too, folks!
And from that place,
That energy-inspired place,
To take action.
That’s the combo.
That’s how it works.
I forget all the time.
Of course, I do.
Permission to be human.
OH!
The hardest of all for me—
Permission to be human.
Permission to be annoyed
And scared
And human.
How to be with my inner privileged annoyance,
My inner
I-want-what-I-want-now-ness?
~~~
Here’s what Pema Chodron, the wonderous Buddhist nun, says about our inner bitchiness. From Awakening Loving Kindness:
“When people start to meditate or do spiritual practice, they often think somehow they’re going to improve, which is a sort of subtle aggression against who they really are. It’s a bit like saying, “If I had a better job, I would be a better person. “If I could meditate, I’d be a better person.”
But loving-kindness toward ourselves doesn’t mean getting rid of anything. It means we can still be crazy after all these years. We can still be timid or jealous or full of feelings of unworthiness. The point is not to try to change ourselves. Meditation practice isn’t about throwing ourselves away to be better. It’s about befriending who we already are. The ground of practice is you or me or whoever we are right now, just as we are. That’s the ground, that’s what we study, that’s what we come to know with tremendous curiosity and interest.”
Dear Folks,
Befriending the inner bitchiness! With a strong commitment to not live there; to notice, to relax, to befriend, and to re-align.
That’s the practice, I do believe.
~~~
For inspiration, a triple-header musical event this week for you.
First, do you know the group, Sweet Honey in the Rock? OHHHH. Sweet Honey in the Rock is an all-woman, African American a cappella ensemble who offer their experience as black women through song, dance, and sign language, unbelievably beautifully and powerfully, for decades.
Here is a celebration of one of their founders, Ysaye Barnwell, on her 75th birthday:
~~~
I adore Playing for Change, the non-profit, multimedia music project, featuring musicians and singers from across the globe, since 2002. The Playing for Change Foundation, created in 2007, builds music and art schools for children around the world.
I couldn’t decide which of these songs most opened my heart. After agitation (befriend the inner agitator), I then realized, wow—why not offer you all two of them? What is the limit, Aruni???
Stand By Me
~~~
Dear Friends,
Permission to bitch, of course, is granted.
Yet—let us choose to return
Again and again
To the heart,
To its inspiration,
To its practice.
May our human experience
Be a doorway back,
Back to our deeper selves,
Back to our heart selves,
Back to our home.
~~
Be safe.
Be well.
Be warm.
All blessings,
Aruni
~~~
YES! Please join us. So simple, so easy. Listen and be listened to. Speak and receive others. Let’s stay connected.
Thursday, March 11th, @ 2:00 EST
http://coacharuni.com/thursdaycircles/
Your payment will indicate your registration.
Suggested payment is $12/session, $40/month.
See you there, dear friends!
Oh! Friends, mark your calendars. On Thursday, March 18, there will be no Share Circle.