Sometimes it just hurts.
End of conversation.
Sometimes life asks us to let go of that which we want to be forever ours.
Sometimes people, places and things shatter our hearts.
That which we take for granted seems up for grabs, suddenly rewritten, re-ordered on a daily basis.
Assumptions are pierced.
Disappointment floods our bodies.
The world around us looks and feels different.
Reality is relentless.
Reality will always win.
Logically, cognitively, we understand;
We know we get it all.
We get the open-heartedness,
Along with the dark night of the soul.
We get the sound of our loved one’s joyous laughter,
Along with the hollow emptiness of our own, 2:00 a.m. breathing.
The faith, the fear,
The joy, the heartbreak—
It’s all true.
So, my question of the moment: why is it so hard to feel the pain?
And—perhaps more importantly, is there more pain to feel these days, in this time of great unraveling?
The despair quote is intensifying for Americans, says Dr. Sanjay Gupta, American neurosurgeon and medical reporter. Life expectancy in the U.S., once the highest in the world, today ranks near the bottom of major developed nations. For the first time, life expectancy is shockingly decreasing in the U.S.
Toxic pervasive stress is the term Gupta uses to describe the galloping circumstances that are fueling the opioid crisis and the increasing the rate of suicide.
I’ve been searching for solace amid some external and internal angst this week.
I find little slivers of solace here and there.
For me, solace exists in our being in this together.
From the I-to-the-We, there is comfort.
I am not alone, even though, when the feelings build, I believe I am clearly The Only One.
We share the stress.
We share the hurt.
None of us are exempt from the heartbreak.
All week I have listened obsessively to this R.E.M. song, sung by the Corrs, an amazing Irish band.
Here’s the good news and the bad news; the way out of the feelings is through the feelings.
That’s yoga for you.
Knowing others are in it with us changes everything.
Knowing we are not alone changes everything.
Knowing we are one-among-many changes everything.
In the emptiness there is such grace.
As the song guides us:
Take comfort in your friends.
You are not alone.
Dear Friends, what shakes up your heart at 2:00 a.m.? What are the triggers, the springboards into your despair? How can you find connection and solace from the people around you? What might that connection look like?
Please know that I’m right here, finding my way, one tiny step at a time. Please keep me posted. I am firstname.lastname@example.org.