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12/11/13

12/11/2013 by Aruni

Family lore has it that I was born in a blizzard. My father’s grocery store was across from the hospital. I can imagine him traipsing back and forth in the snow, probably sick with worry as was his way, his work apron underneath his winter coat, his goulashes open and flapping. I can imagine my parents taking me home from the hospital later in the week, cautiously holding me above the snow drifts, as my mother once told me.

Fast-forward six-and-a-half decades.

The snow outside this morning is moderate, just a few inches covering the land, trees heavy with overnight frost. The scene reminds me strangely of the picture on this blog, which stole my heart with its familiarity.

I wake into the stillness of our room, interrupted by an occasional dog-snore-wheeze, at 3:20, not with youthful enthusiasm about the day but with a quiet acceptance.

Yep, awake for good. 3:20 a.m. No big deal.

Maybe that’s my sixty-fifth year manta: no big deal.

So, what do I know now, on this, the anniversary of my birth?

I know that, no matter what happens, no matter what a BIG DEAL it is, in the bigger picture, it really isn’t a big deal.

I know that, no matter the form or challenge life does take, one day at a time, I will find my way through.

I know that I am surrounded by protection and care, no matter what is happening. No matter how much I forget this, this is the truth of my life.

I know that—when all is said and done—I’m committed to relaxing and allowing this new moment, this new day, this new year to unfold.

It all sounds pretty—vague.

I guess I just want to say: whatever.

Whatever this year gives me, I choose to relax with it. Whatever shape reality takes for me and for those I love, I choose to learn from it.

And most importantly, whatever I am given, I choose to enjoy my life, as best I can, breathing away the struggling, and relaxing into what is.

That’s the plan.

And now, the practice.

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