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And It Filled Up the Sky

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hanging outIt was warm outside and the grass was growing and I wasn’t dead.

The morning light was opening the sky up to itself. I was walking with my mommy and my brother, Zac Joey the Dog. My fav time of day!

There were lots of smells again and things were growing and I was so happy. We were going to my fav spot, during this, my bestest walking time, down to our lake, past the boat ramp to the beach. I loved our little pond. It was pretty big, like a lake, but silly people called it Richmond Pond.

Sometimes people say such silly things.

We were on the path in the woods, smelling and walking and peeing and being together and waking up into the morning like every other morning for all of those years that I lived in my earth jacket. And then—all of a sudden, this giant bird swooped down over us, and all you could see was the bird.

The sky became the bird; the bird became the sky.

We stopped walking.

My mommy cried.

I wasn’t too impressed then because I got all involved in the next moment. Zacy was busy smelling the bunnies so he wasn’t too excited either.

But now, as I hang out in spirit, I feel that birdie inside of me and I remember.

I remember that baby eagle flying off the lake, flying over our heads, waking us up and blessing us with grace.

People! Keep your eyes open down there. Your EarthZone is a pretty cool place.

The blessings are always.

The blessings are everywhere.

The blessings are now.

Rock on and enjoy.

Love,
Your friend in Spirit,
Lucy Kay Doodle the Former Dog

P.S. This cool pix was taken by my neighbor Bill M., who I always loved more than life itself.

I’m Not Blond

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I'm Not BlondBut I’m me, Zac Joseph Doodle. I love having a lot of names, especially when my people say them in baby-talk and make up funny combinations and get me happy.

I’m handsome, my people tell me. I don’t care. Life smells too good to have to be handsome.

My tister, Lucy Doodle, is not here now. I feel that in every single moment of every single moment. It was sad and they cried. I just miss her.

But I’m becoming a big boy now. Even though I am seven entire years old, my tister, Lucy, ran everything, my life and my people’s lives, too. Now I am learning how to be the people’s only pet, how to pay more attention to them, especially if they seem sad.

Lucy was happy and blond and bright. I am tall and dark and busy. I like smelling things, looking for bunnies to imagine chasing, barking at the bad dogs next door. I go to daycare and have friends but mostly I like running around and playing by myself and getting good people-touches when I want them.

I don’t play with the people like Lucy. I’m doing my own thing. But I wag really good, on command and in funny positions. I love my people very much. I love laying all over them and sleeping and snoring like an old man.

Even though I can’t become blond, I am willing to learn how to be a bigger and more grown up boy-dog. My people said something about “new tricks”, being brave, being alone and bunches of other things. I don’t understand a lot of what they say, but I love them very much. They smell so good and they are my pack.

I’m doing new things now that I am the big Boy-Boy (another funny name they call me!). I am going on more errands with the people, because that’s important to do and they need me. I had my first hair cut without Lucy being there. It was scary but now I am even more shiny and handsome! I am a good big boy in the house when I am alone, except once.

I am here to serve.

Do I have a message?

Things change all the time.

Keep smelling, keep looking for the bunnies. You can change and grow up, too! You can go on more errands and get more touches from the people you love.

Well, for a shy guy, I said a lot.

I’m busy now. Gotta look out the window.
I'm Not Blond
Goodbye.

Here I Am

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photoHello to all my two-legged friends on Planet Earth. It’s Lucy Doodle here, your Girl-Dog-Blogger-Being, sending my love to you all.

I wanted to remind you, especially my mommies:

I am right here.

Here I am, in this sunrise. If you stop and breathe and smell, you can smell my doggie toes.

Here I am, in the new spring bird chirping in this freezing morning. If you listen, you can hear my breath, too.

Here I am, not just jumping into the pond (yummy, I loved that so much!), but being the pond.

You guys, I am the pond!

That’s cool and fun.

We’re all the pond, but you guys are too busy living in your earth jackets to remember that.

So everybody, especially my mommies, chill out.

Remember what I said about being in doggie heaven? I meant that heaven is everywhere!

Spirit is all.

We are all together, all the time.

So relax my friends. I am good, beyond-good.

All is so, so very good. No matter what is happening.

Love,
Your Spirited Spirit,
L.D. Doodle the Dog/Bird/Pond/the Everything

Was It You?

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Dear Lucy,

The other morning I woke tentatively into my new normal—-the emptiness of those first breaths without you.

As I cautiously moved myself into the day, I did the things I do; I dressed, I brushed, I walked Zac, I prayed, I ate, I prayed some more. I readied myself for another day living within your absence.

Congratulating myself on feeling emotionally “together and level”, I backed the car out of the garage, willfully focused on moving toward work.

This is good, I thought. I’m moving forward.

The morning was still soft and the light, still early. Slices of new sunlight made its way through the trees on the mountain, crisscrossing the road with patterns of possibility. My heart relaxed into its beauty.

And as I turned the car left to begin the climb up the hill, passing the white house to my right, the one I have driven past a thousand times before, everything inside of me froze: standing in the yard on the hill, facing into the new morning was a blond Doodle dog.

She was just standing there, facing out, greeting the new day, appreciating the light, I imagined, not unlike me.

I pulled over—not a car in sight—and looked at her, drinking in her presence. Silhouetted against the morning light, she just stood there, in all her Doodle-ness, about your size, not as cute, of course (our constant refrain for the twelve years of your life, upon seeing other dogs was, “Cute but not as cute as Lucy”).

I felt, I heard, a wail release from me, and then another, a new level of loss emerging, releasing into this day.

She saw me seeing her. Her tail, yours, perhaps, began tentatively waging, once, twice, the beat picking up.
She wagged her good morning, with curiosity and the possibility of some new fun.

I sat, hands clutching the steering wheel, heart cleaved open again to the loss, to the beauty of this exquisite and excruciating moment.

I forced another breath into my heaving heart, offered my silent farewell, and urged the car away, up the hill, over the mountain, into the new day without you.

Having you so close, as I left you behind, I drove toward the sunlight on the ridge.

My Pack

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familyHi, this is Lucy Doodle, reporting from dog-heaven. I still have a lot to say so here I am, saying it.

My pack had one doggie brother in it and two mommies. I am thinking about my brother right now. More about my mommies some other time.

Here is a picture of us. I can see in my eyes that I don’t feel good there, but that never stopped me from bossing him around.

My brother’s name is Zac Joseph Doodle. Even though he is tall, dark, handsome and a strong young boy, I was always, ALWAYS in charge. He knew that and played good inside knowing that.

I loved chasing him around the apple tree in big giant circles. He would get so excited and scared that he’d run behind the bush in the corner of the yard. The people called that bush Tillie (I don’t know what that means—I think maybe it’s the name of one of my mommies’ mommy). He would dig and dig and be really excited about everything. My one mom got mad about it but I thought it was so funny.

Or he’d run to the other corner by the house and dig really crazy and wild there, too. Like, he would try to dig to a place of sanctuary, freed from my chasing. Ha!

When I was sick, the people gave me less food more often in the day. (Bastards! People, hear me on this: never do that, it upsets us doggies terribly). I would just make a tiny noise sound and he would walk away from his food bowl, leaving me a few nibbles.

I trained Zac well.

We played different. I loved the ball and chasing my mommies with it. He would rather look out the window, scanning the universe for bunnies or something moving out there.

Maybe it’s a boy-thing.

One summer my mommies and I kept playing this elaborate game of badminton with detailed rules, like when I had to sit, who got the point, why I couldn’t eat the birdie, and stuff like that. I always won, anyway. Zac would play with us for about four seconds, get bored, and go smelling for bunny poop to eat.

I taught him about eating stuff, bunny poop or frozen apples or my mom’s vitamins.

Zac taught me about cuddling. Before him I didn’t realize that could be so fun. He showed me how to lean into my mommies when they were on the couch or in a chair. Then they would get all happy and touch and rub me a real lot.

We hung out good during the days without the people. He did what I told him, sometimes pulled stuff down from tall places to eat that wasn’t food (yummy!). He was strong enough to do my bidding.

We had fun.

He’s a little confused and sad now. He doesn’t know why my mommies are paying so much attention to him and talking so loudly and so much. I’m reminding him to relax and enjoy the rubbing.

So—that’s my message today. Relax and enjoy the rubbing while the rubbing is happening, no matter how many legs you have.

Oh, and have fun with your pack. Even if they are not like you and make you mad, they are probably there to teach you how to have more fun, in different and new ways.

That’s my expert doggie advise.

Okay, over and out.

Love to all my four-legged and two-legged friends down there in the snow and everything else there is on earth.

Signed, Lucy Kay Doodle, Dog-Blogger-from-Beyond

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